Yesterday was the first day I felt like I could move on from you- to move forward positively and still be able to consider you my best friend. Today I awoke and I feel like it just happened.
It feels like it just slapped me in the face all over again. All the hurt, all the sadness- I try to push it away but it wells up and needs to be purged. I wish I could talk to someone who isn’t tired of hearing my bullshit about you - usually that person would be you.
In a way- you’ve helped me become more independent in myself and closer to people I pushed away because a large portion of my life revolved around you. I know you realized this, I know it had partial influence over your decision. So- the hardest thing I can say to you is thank you.
But I am still so….lonely…without you. My soul only arises to show itself truly and brightly around you, which is why we couldn’t be lovers- because friendship is more powerful.
